Compatibility Complex.

 This topic (compatibility) is one area in relationships that if not carefully analyzed will be misjudge or even over exaggerated.

A lady can assume, that because she and a guy  usually have a conversation or chat on a regular basis, actually mean they're "compatible".

Well if it was like that, then one would have thought that marriage as ordained by God was meant only for conversation. Come to think of it, you can have a conversation with almost anybody.

Though a good conversation (communication) is one key aspect in relationships and even marriage, but it can't really work alone.

Communication also has to be accompanied with understanding and many others. So you see why, having a conversation alone with a person on a regular basis doesn't guarantee you're compatible.

In fact another thing is, what if the person you claim to be chatting with (verbally or non verbally) was actually pretending to listen to you? Or the person couldn't wait for you to end this your unnecessary conversation of yours?

See there are major things alongside communication that has to be looked out for as far as compatibility is concerned. And they are;

1. Understanding: you can't have a conversation without understanding. It will just be like talking for talking sake. Nothing is understood, and the issue on ground is not dealt with.
2. Similar interest: this is slightly synonymous with Compatibility. Imagine marrying a person whom you don't share a thing or two with in common?
3. Complementation: are you two able to complement each other well. Your wife or partner is into business and there is a particular area she's struggling with in the business, and you the husband you're also a business man and you're also struggling in that same area as your wife or partner is. How does it sound? I know some of you will say, "Ah.....at least they have something they share in common". Not in this case, this is not a very good way to have such a thing in common. 

As a man, you should complement your wife or partner in certain aspects of life or areas of interest in her life and vice versa for the woman.

These are just the few we'll be talking about on this post of ours. So please be careful, don't just jump into conclusion just like that. Otherwise, the guy will see you as being desperate. And if he's a bad guy he might just use you for his own advantage.

We  know some of you will say, "Why is he referring to the ladies as being desperate". Well it is the truth. Guys aren't so freaked out or carried away by marriage, the way you ladies are. In fact most ladies if not all, see marriage as the definition of a successful life.

So ladies, biko (in Igbo), Laho (in Benin), (they all mean please), don't be too carefree to confuse what you think you heard, and that of actual reality. For you might have heard what you wanted to hear by you thinking out loud.

And again please ladies, don't make a big deal out of a guy's sentence (especially if you don't know if he loves you or not).

He might not have necessarily meant it, the way you took it to be. Instead of assuming, why don't you give the guy sometime and space to actually prove that he's really into you?